Friday, January 14, 2011

Quilting with Beer Goggles

I have been putting off making this sample simply because I like to ''let it all out'' when I work on applique on a grand scale. I need room to breathe. I need to use a large design wall. I need paper plates. I need to start and finish in one day. I need to give my children away to family members for the weekend. I need a seam ripper.

It is simply amazing what one can accomplish with a seam ripper and beer. I am completely serious. I love the sound of an ice cold can being cracked open and slipped into a quilters beer coozie. My first gulp is by far the most satisfying. Once that is taken care of, little else matters.

I have heard of the mandatory glass of wine to start out your sewing adventure; and I am with you there as well, sister; so go on and choose your poison. As long as you kick back and relax, you can have fun with your project. Quilting with beer goggles helps you choose fabrics that you wouldn't buy on a 75 percent off sale table in the best of quilt shops. You are likely to drop a few stitches without a care in the world. Friends will smother you with compliments on your quilting expertise as you hold your pattern upside down (which is kind of like a map anyway, you understand). You will lose and find, lose and find that needle with your hands, feet, and rear end and feel no pain. You are a goddess. You also have a collection of seam rippers that go beyond the norm, so that when you 'come to' in the morning to that quilt, you can rip it all out again, baby. Because now that you have done this whole thing intoxicated, It should be a walk in the park sober.

Sure your friends will snicker ''Oh, my gosh! Do you even remember what you did last night? You were out of control! You did a reverse applique Baltimore album block with double-knit polyester!'' (which is totally amazing since that was not one of the U.F.O.'s that you brought with you, that you probably actually have)

So, the sample got done. I didn't have to do it intoxicated, just buzzed. That way I could tell you the next day that it's name is Sugar Pop.


Wendy said...

Love your post!! If I can pawn off the kids for a night, I may have to try quilting with beer goggles :O) I just found your blog via the Bitchy Stitcher and figured if you read, and enjoy, her, you must be a-okay...I was right! I'll be back for more! Have fun ... I gotta find or make a quilted beer cozy now!

Marsi @ The Cottage Cheese said...

My husband actually seemed startled, I laughed so hard at this post. My aunt gave me her old sewing machine a few months ago. My parents were just in town from Texas (they live in Granbury), and I had been excited for months about Mom giving my first sewing lesson. I'm hooked! I don't have much time for hobbies because of the Etsy shop, but I can see myself becoming a fabric junkie, making new pillows and drapes for each season...

Oh, and having an ice cold beer next to my machine makes it even more fun.