Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Ta-Da


I have a feeling that Carol woke in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat from a nightmare. She was probably dreaming that I had decided to keep her round robin quilt for myself. In her dream, I am sleeping like an angel under the most beautiful compass in the county. It is probably hand quilted with intricate feathers and miniature cross-hatching. Maybe even has a label on the back that says "To my wonderful friend, Monica. Love, Carol."
Wow, I guess that would be a nightmare for her. Carol, if you are out there. I promise that I didn't put a stitch of binding on it. It is safe and sound, awaiting its next (freaking awesome, beautiful, monica-made) border. I have my EQ6 program holding on to the border so it will have to be a surprise to all of you when I get that one done. Selling our old house kind of put my quilting, blogging, and potty-training on hold. But now...I am climbing out of the wood works again. Trust me. I have a lot to talk about.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Potty Mouth

I am quite sure that I am the only person on the planet that can make my phone ring by sitting down on the toilet. Every time. I just wish that I had talents that could make me rich and famous, but a butt that gets people to call you is not exactly the kind of material that gets you on 'Entertainment Tonight'.
I have a two-year-old. The only way I can 'hide' from him is to read a short chapter in a well locked (and ventilated) realm for 5 minutes. Mommies everywhere know exactly what I am talking about. These 5 minutes are so precious, that if we do not get them, we start talking to ourselves while ironing those used dryer sheets that you are supposed to throw away after each use.
There actually was a time when I would try to finish my 'chapter' so that I could beat the phones 4th ring before the answering machine picked up. What the hell for? It would only be my husband calling me from work saying he is bored and what am I doing...let me tell ya gals, it is a lot better to let the answering machine pick up. Your husband will think that you are out having the time of your life without him, possibly making him jealous as hell, when really you are just trying to see if Elizabeth ever gets Mr. Darcy to pop the question.
My son has a very similar talent. He saves his most potent #2 packages for the times that we are eating out at a restaurant. Beautiful child. His best ones are delivered at places with no changing stations. I would like to trade this one in for a model who simply throws a tantrum in a store when they don't get the kind of candy they demand. I can deal with that breed without a problem. You simply tell them that Santa and the Easter Bunny are waiting for them at the house and we have to hurry because they are not going to wait for long. When you get home to find the absence of their favorite idols you simply explain that if they didn't waste so much time throwing hissy-fit about the pop rocks you'd would be sitting in fisher-price bliss right now.
I think that I am going to install a phone in the bathroom. It will help lower the number of calls from tele-marketers. And besides, Oprah might be trying to get ahold of me.

Friday, May 9, 2008

Goodbye, baby Connor


I am losing my baby. Connor turns 2 today, so technically he is not a baby anymore. He is a male though, so he will, in, fact always be a baby, just a bigger one. Yesterday was his last day as a real baby. I held him so hard that I think his eyes look bigger today. Twice he had out of the blue kissed me and said 'yuvoo, mama' and gave me a hug with a pat on the back. It is kinda funny to feel him pat me on the back. His little arms try to reach way around to do it. I wish that I could just record everything like this. While Connor and I had a mommy/son lunch today, I got to talking with an older lady at the next table. She was quite taken with Connor and asked how old he is. I told her that it was his 2nd birthday today. She said that she never had children and loves being around them when they are young. She said that it must get very tiring though. I told her that having children is like having a swimming pool in your backyard. They cost a lot of money to acquire and maintain. They are very hard to keep clean. They leak when you least expect it. In short, they require a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. But the times that you have fun with them after utter exhaustion, the memories that you collect from all of the celebrations, or being able to enjoy them as a family or all alone...make all of the hard work worth it. I recommend that everyone get a pool for their backyard...even if it is just a kiddie pool.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

another UFO wanna be



This is a picture of a quilt top that I wanted to share with you all. It was made by Carol Hassel, a friend of mine. I thought it might be a great way to get rid of scraps, (or you could still send them to me!) or it would make a great block exchange idea. This one was a block exchange done in batiks with white bars on each side of the rectangular 4-patch to make it square. I love how it has the illusion of being rectangles. If the white parts were brown or black and the patches green and brown, it would look like an aerial picture of the crops in North Dakota. I might even have some wheat prints and tree prints...sunflower prints, some house prints. I would love to make one, and I will, if I ever get the 32 other quilts done...

Honorable Mention

O.K. I am going to be vague about this story to protect the guilty. I am a member of a certain non-profit organization. One of our tasks is to make these 'items' for a particular group of people in need. The other day, when I was collecting these 'items' from other members, I had a lady tell me that she thought that we should give out pins to those people (like her) that made so many of these items. She said that she was making one of these items a month. Lets pretend that these items are shirts to make the story a little more interesting. Now, I am going to list a few reasons why I think this pin idea is stupid. One; on a financial standpoint, these pins are going to have to be ordered and paid for. I know that I am not going to waste any of my time ordering pins when I could spend it cutting fabric for these 'shirts'...or blogging. The budgeted amount that we have to spend on fabric and other costs for these 'shirts' is somewhat small, as can be expected from a non-profit organization, so taking half of that budget amount to pay for an order of pins is not exactly bright. Second, some of the members of this organization get together as a group to make these shirts so that more can be made in a smaller period of time. Should each member of the group get a pin? How about those people who pay for the fabric for these shirts out of their own pocket and donate it, but never are able to make a shirt. Also, there are members who cannot sew a shirt but can cut out fabric for the shirts all day long and are able to do 10 in a month, where another member cannot cut, but can sew 10 shirts in a month...according to this lady, only those people who cut the fabric for the shirt and sew it completely should get pins (like her). Wow, it is my opinion that if people are willing and wanting to help in any way that they possibly can, that help should be taken very gratefully, no matter how large or small. Last, (and definitely not least) why on earth do people need a damn sign on their forehead that says: Look at me, I did more nice things than you did. Why are there so many people who want some kind of credit or attention for a good deed that they have done. It just pisses me off to no end. If I do something for someone, it is because that person needs or deserves it. I don't need any medal or pat on the back. There is this thing that happens in your heart when you do something for someone else, and it feels good. That good feeling is all that I need. There. I feel better.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Nice set of pillows ya got there.





Two blog posts today! This one is about a project that I just finished. My mother in law was given a chair cushion by her grandmother when she was a little girl that was made for her little wicker rocking chair that is now in our sons room. The cushion was adorable, with an appliqued kitten in a basket done with a yellow 30's print fabric. The problem was that it was extremely stained and had mildew spots on the muslin background. After taking the cushion apart, I carefully washed the cushion cover in OXY. This got the main stains out and cleaned it up very nice. Then I meticulously took each piece apart and found that the muslin was appliqued to the yellow background (so there was extra fabric back there to use on another project!) I cut new muslin and re-appliqued the kitten and basket to it, making sure to match every stitch hole so that it would not be obvious that it had been taken apart. I then appliqued the muslin kitten/basket block back on to the yellow print exactly as it had been, except that I cut out the back of the yellow fabric to omit thickness. With this 'extra' fabric, I made another block using the 'Pride of Ohio' block pattern since that is where my mother-in-law lived as a little girl. I put batting and muslin to the back of each block and hand quilted them both. I added a matching border to the blocks then sewed a back to them that buttons so that the pillow cases can now be removed for washing. Please enjoy the following pictures as an idea to use if you have something special that you want to save but do not have enough for a quilt. P.S. I found after research that the kitten pattern (called "Kitten Basket")came from both Alice Brooks (#6218) and Laura Wheeler (#604) of Old Chelsea Station Needlecraft Service in the 1940's. It was a pattern that you would get by mail order from an ad in a newspaper.

Quilters sleep when they die.

Hey everyone! I did not get much sleep last night. I could not fall asleep even though I was extremely tired. 3AM and I finally did, just to wake up again to Connor having one of his fits. Then I went walking this morning with my neighbor. (I have been very naughty and have missed a couple of days, or I would have said forget it). We are now into the afternoon and I still have not had a single cup of Joe. And I need one of those like Britney needs underwear. You all probably wonder what kinds of crazy things quilters do at 1 and 2 in the morning; and I could probably tell you, but I would be breaking a very sacred oath that quilters take on the 3rd night of their first retreat right after the chocolate baptism. We just cannot tell you. Even our husbands do not know. If any of them wake in the middle of the night to check on us, well, we just say something crazy like "I thought I heard someone outside getting into your truck and now I cannot sleep." At this point he could care less that we or fabric even exist and is outside in his boxers checking the alarm which may or may not go off. This is called 'The Diversion'. Another thing that we may do is pretend we were sleep-walking. (This will probably only work once and not if we are found pushing fabric into a machine at the time.) If your quilter happens to come home after running errands and has with her a chocolate item, a fabric item, and a new doo-hickey that she got at the quilt store (on sale...40% off!); it is one hint that there is something going down in quiltville tonight. And guys...if she comes to bed at 4 in the morning crying with a seam ripper in her hand, she is not trying to scare the life out of you. She just needs a hug. Pry the thing out of her icy grip first though.