Quilters sleep when they die.

Hey everyone! I did not get much sleep last night. I could not fall asleep even though I was extremely tired. 3AM and I finally did, just to wake up again to Connor having one of his fits. Then I went walking this morning with my neighbor. (I have been very naughty and have missed a couple of days, or I would have said forget it). We are now into the afternoon and I still have not had a single cup of Joe. And I need one of those like Britney needs underwear. You all probably wonder what kinds of crazy things quilters do at 1 and 2 in the morning; and I could probably tell you, but I would be breaking a very sacred oath that quilters take on the 3rd night of their first retreat right after the chocolate baptism. We just cannot tell you. Even our husbands do not know. If any of them wake in the middle of the night to check on us, well, we just say something crazy like "I thought I heard someone outside getting into your truck and now I cannot sleep." At this point he could care less that we or fabric even exist and is outside in his boxers checking the alarm which may or may not go off. This is called 'The Diversion'. Another thing that we may do is pretend we were sleep-walking. (This will probably only work once and not if we are found pushing fabric into a machine at the time.) If your quilter happens to come home after running errands and has with her a chocolate item, a fabric item, and a new doo-hickey that she got at the quilt store (on sale...40% off!); it is one hint that there is something going down in quiltville tonight. And guys...if she comes to bed at 4 in the morning crying with a seam ripper in her hand, she is not trying to scare the life out of you. She just needs a hug. Pry the thing out of her icy grip first though.